A Sweet Blossoming
by Yih
Summary: IC. Yue x Sakura. This fanfic is about the finding love and the developmental pattern. It also contains a few Eriol x Sakura scenes later on, along with Touya x Tomoyo as well!
1. AHold Embrace

Title: A Sweet Blossoming

Title:**A Sweet Blossoming (1)**

Author:Yih

Written:August 7/8/9, 2001

Disclaimer:All rights of characters are exclusively Clamp.

_Visit my website at [http://a-dreamer.fws1.com][1] _

1: A-hold Embrace

"I miss him," she cried to him, resting her shoulder upon his gentleness.The few tears that she shed dampening his shirt and melting his already fragile heart.She sighed comfortingly as he wrapped her arms around her slender form and endured the torture in the holding.He tried to keep his body still, but it was impossible, these feelings couldn't be stopped even though they were horribly wrong.So he moved her body against his form until there wasn't an inch of space left between the two of them.They were stuck together as if they were meant to never be separated.And how he looked upon this observation with a wry smile when it came to him, it was anything but happy.It was more like accepting…

They were not meant to be together.

He was not her true love.

"I wish he was here with me now," she whispered achingly as she tucked her head into the hollow of his throat.His breath caught itself as he felt her soft, pink lips brush ever so slightly against his sensitive throat.How he wished it were he that she was referring to!Oh, how he wished it in the veins that carried the oxygen to his heart, and gave him this miserable existance to always be the one that was forever there and never the one wanted.It nearly crushed him, those unhopeful thoughts, but what had he to hope for when the one she missed stood in his way and had her heart?

"Nothing," he muttered to himself, as if to confirm what he already believed in the deep recess of his heart."Nothing at all," the last utterance was so soft only the keenest of ears could have possibly heard it, unfortunately the girl he held in his arms happened to be one of the millions that had those pairs of ears.

"What?Nothing?" her tone clearly voiced the confusion that his rambling had caused."Is something wrong?" she inquired as though she hadn't been crying her heart out to him a moment before, though he still saw the hint of tear streaks on her pale pink cheeks.It was so very much like her to ask about how he was when it was she that was the true sufferer, the true person in torment.

He gently caressed her face, stroking those rose-hued cheeks as if they were the finest porcelain vase to be found.And of course they were, to him.He wanted to be able to kiss those tears and lick them away with his tongue, but it wasn't his right to do so.He wasn't suppose to be the one that was holding her, but he was.So wouldn't it be okay just to kiss her this once?He closed his eyes and held her tightly to him, his breath quickening at the very thought of his petals touching her velvety ones.The fantasy he had was breaking out of the dream world into reality, fortunately?

Alas, it was not to be.For when he opened his orbs, he saw that her lips trembled as he touched them softly with the tip of a slender digit.He wondered if it was his touch that she feared or that she knew it was wrong, shying away from it as if it were a dead corpse."Nothing is wrong.I was just… daydreaming," he finally managed to answer her when he forced his breathing to return to normal.But try as he might, the dizzying speeds of his pulse continued on their dangerous march, making him start to see things that weren't really there to begin with.

Her green eyes so alive, so vibrant seemed to be showered with love, for him?Her mouth seemed to whisper words so tenderly, so lovingly for his ears alone?But he had to blink to erase those wonderful conjurings and finally was able to see that they were just his imagination.Her eyes were slightly puffy from the rubbing she gave to try to hide the tears of sadness.And her sweet lips had said not one word of warmth for him, for she had not spoken at all.

"I'm sorry," she said abruptly, the weight of her face leaving the safety of his embrace."I do not mean to trouble you with my worries."Yes, he knew that she did not like to trouble other people, she was more than willing to be troubled with other people's problems.But today was different, it she was that was hurting, and it pained him to see her so tortured.If he could have made it right in whatever way possible, he would have done so.There just seemed to be no way, and he just wanted to kiss her as her lips pressed together quickly after being parted to speak.

It was a temptation that was going to be his undoing, her sweet, alluring lips.God, how he wanted to taste them just once, and perhaps it would not be as he imagined--ecstasy."Don't be sorry," he murmured to her, wanting to draw her nearer, but fearing what would happen if he did pull her closer, bringing himself closer to the sweet enticement."I'm here for you," he nearly choked as the words spilled from his mouth.He had said too much, it was all he felt but didn't want her to know quite yet, perhaps forever.He wished he could creep back inside himself, but it was as if he had to torture himself.He needed to hear a response from her to what he had said.

"Thank you," she softly said, resting her hand against his solemn face."I'm glad you're here for me."

Those words, those words… brought a groan from his pale lips, they were all he wanted to hear, all that was needed to foster a new growing hope of what could be.It was wrong, terribly wrong, but he could no longer help it.Once those words had left her delectable lips, as soon as her hand had rested upon his cool cheek, his lips reached down to brush against her in the softest of kisses.It was more of a brushing of flesh than a true blooded kiss, but it felt like a kiss to him.

It fed the fire in his veins as the blood pumped from his heart at an alarming rate.It was glorious this first kiss, he decided.He pulled back after the merest taste of her nectar, his slender frame shuddering a bit from too much delights.It was then as his eyes drifted away from her delicious petals that he saw the surprise in her emerald orbs, a shock that undid the sense of wonderment in that kiss.And burned the hopes that had only just begun to flicker to life.

"I don't know what happened," he finally said lamely, trying to explain it as if it had meant nothing to him when it had meant everything."I'm sorry; I didn't mean to, I just got carried away.You were… so close."

He was mortified after his words had finished rambling out to his doom.And mortify was the light word to use.He was horrified to his gut that he had confessed as much, for he seemed to not be able to contain his emotions at all today.How was that possible when he was the hero of stoicism?The one that stood in the face of battle as calm and as steady as a statue?The one who never failed to not show even the tiniest glimpse of emotion?And the one who had just spoke what was in his heart as clearly as if he were a child incapable of lying.

"Yue..?" 

The question was clearly in the faint utterance of his name.It made him want to shiver, to show some emotion, but this was the point where he suddenly felt a coldness spread over his limbs.His face was calm like the eye of a hurricane.He almost wanted to berate himself for going so emotionless at a time when it was warranted.But then again, it might save him from…from what he wanted most out of life?

"Yue..?"

"Yes, Sakura?" his lips barely kept the tremble out of them.To say her name was pure pleasure on his tongue.It was a joy he had tried to deny himself, but at this instant, he knew whatever ice had chilled the showing of his feelings couldn't hide the tenderness in his eyes.He was scared that she might look upon those windows to the soul and know exactly what he felt for her.Then again, he almost wanted her to look and see all that she meant to him.

"Nevermind," she responded as her hand fell limply to her side, her face slowly inching away from his.The soft caresses from her hushed breaths no longer melting the ice blocks around his heart, instead the chill returned with a ferocity to his bones.

He yearned to ask why she didn't ask what he meant.It ate at his soul that she wasn't interested or vaguely curious in the confession of what was in his heart.But then again, he thought of how innocent she was, such a purity in this tainted world.His heart went out to her for all the hardships she had to suffer as the Card Captor, the Mistress of the Clow--no the Sakura Cards.Could he not be as brave as she?

"Sakura?" he murmured her name to his pink muscle's delight.The simple thrill sending a tingle down his spine.He finally had the courage to show her what he felt.He felt he had to do it now or forever rest his affections in the shadows of the one she loved.His breath was held as her green eyes searched into his silvery ones for why there was a thread of question in his voice.He was always so sure of himself, so confident and now he felt like the most gauche school boy.

"Look at me," he whispered sensually to her.His voice so warm, it surprised him more than it did her.For she knew he had more depths to him than even he showed to her, his Mistress."Look at me, Sakura," he demanded this of her more than he asked her.

And so she looked and was astonished.His heart was so clearly in his eyes, hanging there waiting for her to cut him down or take him in.He trembled when she touched his lips, a tremble of pure elation.The need was naked in those moonlight eyes, the want for her in the softness of his mouth, and so he waited for an answer.A return of his affection, hopefully?Or the rejection of all his dreams…

"I… can't look, Yue," she answered heartbrokenly, her hand again falling from scintillating touch upon his skin."I can't look for what I do not deserve."

He nearly demanded why she thought she did not deserve what he was showing her.But he did not.His arms fell as if broken in a hundred different ways away from her waist.And he looked away from her, his silvery mane shielding his eyes from the glistening of tears that had formed at the base of his eyes.He damned himself for being the fool and risking it all.Now, she would never--could never looked at him the same way.

He had spoilt everything for what?

A stupid dream that would never come true.Never.He knew that now.

It was hopeless.

**Author's Note:**Yeah, this is a series.I know I'm bad, but hey I wrote 5,000 words this week and don't feel burned out.I'm enjoying it again!Yes!And I've always wanted to do a Sakura x Yue series since forever, long before Reminiscent!Anyhow, I really love the first part, and it could stand alone for a while 'til I make up the next part because between 3 AP classes and X Country, I don't have much time to even think about writing.

   [1]: http://a-dreamer.fws1.com/



	2. Nothing Under the Sun

Title:  **A Sweet Blossoming**

Author:  Yih

Written:  August 2001/ December 2001

Disclaimer:  All rights of characters are exclusively Clamp.  

_Visit my website at http://www.seiki.f2s.com _

2: Nothing Under the Sun

The darkness hurt his eyes.  Another gloomy day turned into a miserable night.  He had tried not to mope after Sakura's rejection of his affection, but it was hard not to feel dejected.  All his hopes, all his dreams had been in some way threaded with his fantasy of her.  Now that it was a path shut off to him, decided for him again much like the Judgment had been decided for him.  He wasn't even given the chance to try and change what would be.  It was to be what it was to be, whether he liked it or not.  And Yue was bitter, eaten up inside by this continuous cycle of what's chosen for him.  

If only… 

If only he had been kinder in the beginning, maybe then he could have used the crush she had on Yukito for his own gain.  In truth, that would have been the cleverest thing—the trickiest thing he might have pulled to make Sakura feel what he felt for her.  But that was then, when he was still caught up in the maelstrom of emotions for Clow Reed.  It was true, he did love his former Master in ways he perhaps would never fully understand, but it wasn't that burning desire he felt for Sakura.  Rather it seemed almost parental, and that made the most sense because Clow Reed in essence had been his creator and father.  Yet he hadn't realized his affection, the root of his love for her until it was too late.  

If only he had shone more personality than a rock, if he dazzled her like Yukito had done.  If only he had reacted sooner than this.  But would that have really changed anything?  He sighed painfully, as if every breath living with this huge disappointment weighed upon his fragile soul in a detrimental way.  It was all he could do to draw that oxygen into his lungs so that he might live one second longer in a barren world without any dreams any longer.  

"Why?" he whispered to himself, a voice so softly echoed into the dead of night that the silence after that disturbance of peace was eerie and uncanny.  But he didn't feel like he was going to be able to keep all these feelings, these suppression in his soul anymore.  He had to release them somehow—in a way he wasn't entirely comfortable with.  Yet how could he ever be content when he was so utterly desolated now?  He had took the chance and lost the prize.  The prize—the love of his life, Sakura.  

"Why?" he uttered this time louder, breaking up the quietness.  "Why?!" he nearly shouted.  "Why!" he screamed as loud as he could.  "Why does this always have to happen to me?  Why am I always the one left alone?  Why am I the one that is continuously rejected?  Why—why—why me?  Why not him?  Why does it have to be the one that feels truly for her as I do?  He doesn't love her.  I love her.  I love her.  I love her.  But why doesn't she love me?

"She loves him more than I can bare because the pain is so visible upon her face—since he's gone away.  But why does it have to happen to her when I'm here for her?  Why can't she love me as she loves him?  Is it because my life is meant only to serve and not to feel?  Than why do I feel this pain in my heart when I see how hurt she is?  Why can't it be like before when I was hurting her, trying to make her fail the Judgment for you, Clow?  Why can't it be like that again?  

"Wasn't leaving me alone here enough, Clow?  Wasn't leaving me here by myself when you knew I wanted to go with you, not enough?  Why must you make me so weak inside?  Why did you give me these human feelings?  Why did you give me the capability to love you and to love Sakura?  Why can't I be just thing that can be wielded like the cards?  Why must I be able to think and feel and be and know and see and hear and—to feel—oh to feel such burning pain when she's in pain… oh to feel such agony watching her love someone else?  To watch her actually reject me in front of my face…"  

The images from the past haunting him as he stood on the edge of the ledge, a balance so fragile it could be broken by the faintest of movements.  Just one wrong step or move would bring utter disaster, but he knew this edge well.  He came here often, not to rant but to just be.  It wasn't often that he even uttered a word.  He usually just came here to be alone and to allow all his thoughts to overwhelm himself of her.  But tonight was different, he had her answer now and nothing he could do would change anything anymore.  It was final.  It was done.  There was nothing he could do or say.  

She didn't love him, and she never would.  

"I can't stand this anymore."  

And so he took that deadly step, allowing himself to fall a plunging 100 stories to his fateful doom.  He didn't even try to open his wings because he wanted the full impact of gravity to crunch his bones and decimate his body.  What was this existence anymore without her?  What was this trying to go on?  It was nothing.  It was better not to be.  He bit his lip for a second as the rush of the cool night's air tickled his feathered wings, itching him for the moment he would release himself from this dangerous situation.  But he wouldn't allow himself to give him.  He closed his eyes and swept his mind into himself.  

He wanted this end.  

He needed this end.  

The force of gravity pulling him closer and closer to terminal velocity, the gathering speed rushing around him as his body accelerated at a dizzying rate.  And all he could think about was Sakura.  Sakura's enchanting eyes.  Sakura's luscious lips.  Sakura's cheerful cheeks.  Sakura's wonderful ways.  Sakura's funny fears.  Sakura's sweet smile.  Sakura's tempting tenderness.  Sakura's saintly soul.  

It was her soul that he loved more than anything.  That she would hold out her hand after he had spent himself trying to defeat her, to end all the glorious memories she had capturing the cards.  He didn't care then; he didn't care at all.  But he did now, if that mattered any to the fates.  It was her soul that made him ache inside thinking of that horrible time.  It lingered within him, that want inside to change things.  More than anything he wanted… he needed.. he should have shown himself to her the moment he met her.  He definitely should have re-enforced that growing affection that she had for Yukito.  

He was the one that controlled Yukito if he had wished.  But he had not.  He had only observed her child-like cuteness with stolid solemnity.  How could he not  adored her antics?  How could he not relish her rants on Touya?  But somehow he had, he had let himself stay trapped within Yukito as merely an observer at a boring convention.  Yet it was anything but dull or boring.  It was interesting; it was alive—refreshing.  And he couldn't handle it then, he wasn't sure he could even handle it now after all the years he had been in his real form.  

He bit his lip harder, nearly drawing blood as his long silken strands flew wildly around as his body caught upon a whiff of a breeze, wrinkling through his traditional guardian robes softly as compared to the rushing air of his deadly plunge.  He barely felt it, but what he felt reminded him of Sakura.  Everything that was beautiful beyond compare; anything that was loaded with loveliness—made him think of her.  All the good in the world came into itself and infused itself into Sakura.  How could he not realize that it was her all along?  

That she was meant to be the Mistress of the Clow Cards and the Mistress of his heart?  

He was damned foolish—so utterly clueless.  How had he not known?  He was so insightful, unlike Keroberos.  He saw what there was to see, heard what was to heart—yet he hadn't known all along his destiny was in front of him.  He thought he had passed it by because Clow Reed was gone, but that was hardly the case.  Now he knew and it was too late.  

"Too late," he murmured, barely hearing his voice as the surging air snatched his words and carried them faraway from him into the world of the wind.  He sighed retrospectively as he delved deeper into himself and lost touch with the reality of the lost dream.  In this mode he neither thought too harshly of the missed joy nor too whimsically on what might have been, instead he just thought and questioned moving more into the thoughts of Sakura than the rhetorical meaningless questions that would remain unanswered.  

He dragged into his lungs perhaps his last breath as his body continued to descend to the Earth at a fatal speed.  His mind, his thoughts, his feelings, his emotions, his soul being captured into this bubble that would dramatically burst freeing his spirit to wander and to find a place for him to belong.  With that last intake, he waited to feel the impact of his physical being crumbled into gritty fragments that were misshapen and disfigured.  

In the very last second he opened his eyes to see the gray ground widening in a strange way as if it were going to open up, crack away the pavement and envelop his body.  The fractures on the ground of common foundation problems seemed to broaden into the jaws of death waiting to swallow his soul as he plummeted down, nothing could stop him anymore.  Even if he released his wings, that would just bring the fall into a softer, kinder fall—perhaps sparing his life.  But the pain would come and it would hurt… oh it would hurt.  

But it wasn't anything he couldn't take.  He would take this.  He would take this over losing her again and again.  Because this was final and would never be felt again.  This was momentary while she was eternity.  Infinite pain he knew he couldn't stand.  It was too much for one that was built with a soul as his, sensitively rooted deep within him—almost clouded by this solid exterior he exuded.  And so he was ready to die this death.  

He was ready and willing for this end.  

He wanted it. 

He craved it.   

He needed it. 

He desired it.  

It was harder to live than to die.  __

_Without her_, he was nothing; _with her_, he was everything.  

And he could have her, could he?  

No, no it was not to be.  

So he closed his eyes and waited for Death's doors.  

"There's hope in this route."  

**Author's Note:**  Wow!  3 months and this series gets kickin' again.  Wow!  Reminiscent's update is on the way.  Give me time.  I'm just gettin' into my writing mode again (right before Finals, not smart eh?!)  Well… expect an update in Reminiscent this X-mas break and most likely I'll try to write the ending's definite layout so I can finish it before it's birthdate sometime this upcoming spring.  ^_^  As always reviews are highly appreciated.  

**P.S.** If you leave an email in your review I'll email you when the next chapter's out.  


	3. Another Petal Falls

Title:  **A Sweet Blossoming**

Author:  Yih

Written:  December 2001

Disclaimer:  All rights of characters are exclusively Clamp. 

_Visit my website at http://www.seiki.f2s.com  _

_May it be an evening star_

_Shines down upon you_

_May it be when darkness falls_

_Your heart will be true_

_You walk a lonely road_

_Oh! How are you are from home_

_Mornie utulie (darkness has come)_

_Believe and you will find your way_

_Mornie alantie (darkness has fallen)_

_A promise lives within you now_

-"May it Be" (Enya from LotR soundtrack)

_There's hope in this route.  _

"But there's not."  

Yue heard the contradiction just as he felt his body being caught by the gentlest breeze of the magical wind.  His eyes flew open as he searched for his savior, having the distinct feeling that it was not who he hoped it would be.  Shifting his face right to left, he looked for the one that have kept him from his tragic end.  Of all people, he had never expected this person to be the one to rescue him.  Why now?  Of all times… why now?

"I can't read your thoughts, Yue.  But I can see that you are thinking of something quite important.  Why don't you tell me?" murmured the encouraging voice, though the owner of the beautiful voice was no where to be found.  "Maybe it will help me to understand why you have decided to rid the world of your magnificent presence.  I would have thought you'd have a reason to live now."  

"That reason is gone," answered Yue bitterly.  

"Are you so sure?"

"Yes."  

"I would have thought otherwise," replied the warm voice.  "But I'm deeply surprised that you'd try to kill yourself over such a thing as no reason, no purpose to live.  You've lived with such a burden long enough now after the test.  But you've just given up now… why is that?  Why don't you fight for what you want?  Why have you taken this cowardly route?"  

"Because I can't take the pain anymore.  I can't stand this… watching… waiting… wondering… when will it be my turn to be loved?  So just let me be.  Let me die, you owe me that much.  You can see how miserable I am wherever you are," Yue remarked, his head hanging down with incredible weariness.  Even his shoulders looked like they were being pressed with a weight that the beautiful soul could hardly bear.  

This time the voice didn't bother to answer him back, instead Yue felt the lightest caress against his cheek.  The sensual tingle raced down his spine as he wistfully remembered that ill-timed kiss.  How he wished that surprise, that stunned look might have been erased from Sakura's face.  But it was too late to change anything.  He had done; he had taken the risk, and he had lost.  

"Such a sad expression, Yue.  Why?"  

"Because I lost."  

"Are you so sure?  I've lost before."  

"How have you ever lost?" he questioned acrimoniously with slight disbelief.  

"I have lost many things.  Most of them I spent some time reflecting regretfully, and the others I still haven't forgotten.  I was a fool; I was an idiot.  But there's not anything I can do about it, can I?  You can't change the past; you can only plan for the future in the present.  Whose to say, Yue, that you can't eventually get what you want?" asked the voice with well thought out logical reasoning.  

"Because," Yue began, "I have waited these years and still I must be more patient.  But I can't stand it anymore.  I can't wait any longer.  My desires have become burdens.  My fantasy has turned into a nightmare.  Every time I look at my dream, I see what I cannot have.  Everything I ever wanted was hopelessly entwined with that reverie.  I thought I might get it if I waited.  But here I am, waiting all these years and still I must wait more.  There's not even the slightest hope that my want, my need will come to fruition.  Because I've been here and I've seen there is no chance.  I took a risk and tried to gain what I wanted most and I lost."  

"The bet?"  

"The chance…"  

"There is always more than one chance."  

"Not for me," Yue retorted.  "There was only the one that is no longer there."  

"Yue… Yue…, my beautiful, my precious Yue… I never meant for you to be unhappy."  

"Did you see this future?" he asked.  

"Yes and no."  

"What does that mean?"  

"I saw you with her, it is Sakura who you are pining for is it not?"  

"Who else could it be?"  

"For a time, I thought you might have chosen Touya.  Yukito was especially close to him.  There was an affection between you two, perhaps it even went deeper than affection.  Of that I'm not quite sure."  

"No, Touya and Yukito were merely very close friends, the best of friends.  But it would have never worked.  Touya has this undeniable sense of honor and responsibility not only for his imouto Sakura, but also for his otousan.  I would say they loved each other, but not quite in the way that you are suggesting."  

"Do you regret that?"  

"No."  

"So it has always been her?"  

Yue ignored the question, instead moving on to the ambiguous answer that troubled his mind.  "What did you mean by 'yes and no'?"  

"I saw you with Sakura," the voice answered reluctantly.  "That was what I saw and that was what has happened.  But I didn't envision the rejection nor this long wait for her."  

"Yes, this long, long wait…" murmured Yue with a harsh voice.  Tears glistened in his eyes as he pushed back his long silvery hair and wrapped his arms around his legs in a fetal position like he was trying to protect his already crushed heart.  "Did the future you saw end happily?"  

"It did."  

"Then why am I so miserable?"  

"I don't know, my dear Yue.  I don't know."  

For a long moment, Yue said nothing.  He just sat there on the damp pavement, his soul wallowing in self pity letting all the walls he had built crumble inside from the tormenting pressure.  There was nothing he could do to change what already was.  He wish he could, but he couldn't.  How he wished; how he dreamt; how he hoped.  It was all gone… gone away.  But there was one thing he wanted to know.  

"Why did you come back, Eriol?"  

"Don't you know?" whispered the reincarnation of Clow Reed.  "I saw it in your expression before I left.  You were glad when I left.  Before, I would have been greatly surprised at the relief I saw in your eyes.  But now, I've accepted the fact Sakura has replaced my place in your heart."  

"No, she didn't replace you in my heart," Yue denied.  

"Oh, but I think she did."  

"She didn't.  I just never knew that the love I felt for you was more paternal than anything, more like a  child to his mother or creator.  The love I feel for her is different, it's a soul-mate kind of love.  It's deep and it's rooted into my heart.  And while there was pain in the first parting, there is always pain in each subsequent parting.  There was no relief in me when I last saw you go, Eriol.  But as you have told me, you are not Clow Reed."  

"No, I'm not Clow Reed.  And you know why I'm here."  

"Yes, I suppose I do."  Yue smiled sadly.  "But if you were going to come back, then why did you leave in the first place?"  

"I thought I'd do the right thing by leaving.  It wasn't that I didn't feel strong in my emotions, but that I was trying to be the hero, the one that sacrificed.  And I had everything, didn't I?  I was the most powerful sorcerer, somehow cursed with this unique vision to see the future—forced to.  But I didn't have everything, did I?  My only friends were those I created.  You, Yue and Kero, then later Ruby and Suppy."  

"Yes, I suppose you didn't have everything."  

"And I should be satisfied with my lot."  

"You should be," Yue agreed.

"But I'm not."  

"No one ever is."  

"I never meant to return, Yue.  I didn't mean to come back," Eriol said, nearly chanting his denial.  

"But you returned nonetheless."  

"Do you hate me?"  

"No, I love you."  

"But could it ever turn to hate?"

Yue shook his head.  "It was my fault—losing her was my fault."  

"It was never your fault," remarked Eriol.  "It was my fault and fate's.  I never saw that this future was possible when I started planning out for the future back then."  

"The future can change.  I never foresaw that I would accept a new master and feel this burning desire for her."

Eriol smiled sweetly.  

"It still doesn't change that you're here for her."  

"No, I don't suppose it does."  

"But—Eriol?"  

"Yes, Yue?"  

"Have you changed?" 

"What do you mean by 'changed'?" asked Eriol, still hidden by his still vast magical power.  

"You know what I mean," Yue retorted, his hand running through his silvery hair.  

"I don't.  I no longer have that vision anymore."  

"I mean—appearance-wise… have you changed?" inquired Yue, feeling other fingers entwining through his mane.  "Eriol?"  

Solid fingers, not the wisp of the wind anymore, any longer.  Life-like.  Real.  The stunning presence of Eriol was slowly coming together like lost pieces of a puzzle found and finally finished.  And his beauty had only grown over time.  Not only had his sheer splendor increase, but he had actually grown to about the height of Clow Reed.  It was uncanny the resemblance between this reincarnation and his long lost Master.  Eerie and strange, unsettling.  

"Clow?"  

"It's Eriol," reaffirmed the sweetly smiling Eriol.  

"Yes.  Yes, I can see it now."  

Though his hair length had lengthened with his body, it was more of a longer European type haircut that was growing in popularity than Clow Reed's own traditional long hair, much as Yue still wore his.  He had to admit that this new Eriol was more beautiful than he even could have imagined.  Perhaps even more than Clow Reed?  And he knew how captivated Sakura still was by the old magician.  

"You can?"  

"Where is Ruby and Spinel?" asked Yue, ignoring Eriol's question.  

"They are with Kaho."  

"I thought you and she were together…"

"We were." 

"What happened?" Yue queried, the words of curiosity slipping from his elegant lips.  

"I couldn't get past the fact she was a descendant of mine."  

"You could say Sakura is the same," Yue remarked ironically.

Eriol sighed.  "But it is not the same.  Her family was my father's line, much as Syaoran was my mother's line.  Sakura is the daughter of one of Clow's reincarnations, but she is not the daughter of the stronger presence of Clow."  

"So you do admit it."  

"Yes, I suppose I do."  

"You are more of Clow Reed than could have existed in any other, but you continuously deny it."  

"I am my own person, my precious Yue.  I hope you understand that."  

"I do, now at least.  But then, I didn't.  I don't suppose I am the same Yue from before.  I was too naïve and unworldly.  But I've gathered a bit of experience now and I can understand.  I think even Kero has changed, much as it is hard to believe," Yue mused.  

Eriol smiled.  "Kero is Kero, but yes even he has changed.  He has grown to love Sakura in way that is as touching as any love that I've seen.  But it is not the same as yours?"  

"I love her," Yue declared fiercely.  

"I know." 

"You love her as well?"  

"I believe so."  

"You are not quit to declare it so… why?"  

"That question is for another day.  Don't give Yue.  Sakura may choose you yet.  You never know until you try."  

With that Eriol vanished into the air.  Yue didn't doubt he would soon be seeing the transformed Eriol soon.  He wondered how Sakura would think of this new Eriol, would she be enraptured with his changed appearance?  How would Eriol react to her own magnificent blooming?  Oh how times change, and people grow… Oh, oh, how this love blossomed inside.  

"I won't give up."  

**Theme Song Note:** "May It Be" is the theme song for A Sweet Blossoming.  If you want to hear this lovely song, please visit www.amazon.com and search for the LotR soundtrack and Enya's song can be downloaded off the site.  ^_^

**Author's Note:**  Hey this update only took 3 weeks wow think of that!  The next update probably will happen pretty soon as well, and after that only depends upon the great encouragement I've seen thus far.  It's been an exhilarating ride!  Anyhow… if you have time read below you'll find a likely excerpt of my new series featuring by request Eriol x Sakura.  Of course, I'm doing this little excerpt section to gather a bit of interest so I know if I should actually think of pursuing this series.  Any feedback would be great.  Reviews really do help me.  Thanks to all that reviewed.  Leave an email address if you want an email for the next update and if you wish to hear when Eriol x Sakura might be released ^_^;;.  

**From Part 1** (_of an Eriol x Sakura series in the making_)

Disclaimer:  All rights are Clamp.  

The black and white contrast of her milky skin to the dark mystery of her eyes sent a spark of pure desire down his spine.  There was only one perfect soul and he was staring into her loveliness right now.  The beauty of her physical glory made him yearn, but the sheer sweetness of her sensitive spirit made him ache.  There wasn't anything that he wouldn't do for her given the chance.  

Now there just had to be a way to express the raging emotions trapped within his outer façade of cheerful contentedness.  Yes, there had to be a way to tell her just how he felt about her.  But the question was how?  Did he tell her directly how he felt, or should he try for a more subtler approach?  How did should he go about telling the objection of his affection his undying adoration of her?  Especially when she was the ever optimistic and totally clueless Sakura.

"Sakura…" he whispered her name romantically, the deep intonation vibrating a particular kind of warmth.  "I… I…" his voice trailed off as his words were sucked away by the captivation he had with the purity of her aura.  "I like you.  

"No—no," he rushed, "I really like you.  No that's not right either.  I—I love you, Sakura."  


	4. Repeat the Moon

Title:  **A Sweet Blossoming**

Author:  Yih

Written:  January 2002

Disclaimer:  All rights of characters are exclusively Clamp.  

Visit my website at http://www.seiki.f2s.com and visit this great manga here http://devoted.to/hanakimi 

"Yue!" exclaimed Sakura as she watched him rush down to the soft grass green garden in a exquisite show of his dynamic wing control.  The trace of worry in the anxious smile on her face disappeared as soon as he landed safely within her arm reach.  And in her reach, he surely was because she dived toward him to hug his slender body in way that seemed she was grasping for her last bit of hope, like the meaning of her life was entrusted in his form.  "I've worried so much about you," she cried out, her face pressed into his chest, "I thought—I can't believe I thought that…  You wouldn't do anything to hurt me like he did, would you?"

The tender expression formed on Yue's face at Sakura's fretful greeting and the feel of her light frame against his own sent a pang of guilt into his heart as straight and as true as any of Cupid's arrows.  He hadn't even considered Sakura's own anguish if he had indeed committed the act.  It wasn't his right to answer the question: "to be or not to be?"  That he should permanently himself put into fate's hand and forget about trying to change what had already been written out somewhere in the divine universe.  Besides, he was just being selfish in trying to rid himself of his misery and forgetting totally of Sakura's own suffering because that every little delight brought her joy, every little tragedy brought her pain.  

"No, no I would never do that," he murmured reassuringly into her ear, his lips brushing lightly against her head.  His nose took in the sweet fragrance that he identified so distinctly with Sakura, much like the North Star reminded him of her—the light, the solitary strength, and the beauty—all that was contained, wrapped up into the sweetest soul he knew… Sakura.  

"I knew you wouldn't," she whispered achingly like her heart had been about to break if his answer had been even slightly different from what she expected.  "Yet, in ways you still remind me of him.  But I shouldn't think of him, should I?  It only hurts and hurts you, doesn't it?  You care for me deeply, I know but I don't deserve do I?  By wanting you to be close to me as I do, I bring you the very agony I wish to divulge of myself."  

"No, I was just being selfish and foolish," he admitted gravely.  "I don't know what I was thinking of by leaving you here when you needed me most."  There were things he might of added like how being with her even in this strange atmosphere was settling, serene, and satisfying though it did sting a little that no matter what he did, she might never love him the way he loved her.  If there had been a way to bring back the one she loved, he would have given anything to fulfill her wish.  But it wasn't possible if the one she loved didn't want her in return.  

Love was a sort of agonizing hell and heaven all at the same time.  

"It's okay," she replied, leaning back into the comfort of his being.  "At least you're here now."

Her words… her words… would be the death of him yet.  The hope bursting forth, only to be cruelly yet unknowingly crushed by the expression on her face, the brush away of her hands, her very body language had nuances of not being ready.  Perhaps, she would never be ready.  He was and had been her first true love—now that he was gone, that only reinforced the mystic of what might and could have been.  

"Yes, I'll always be here for you," he echoed his words lightly.  "You know that don't you?  I've been chosen to be your guardian since the beginning probably, and that I will always be.  You can count on that.  I'll be by your side, no matter what happens.  I hope you are never sad again, but that is unrealistic—so I've got to be by you so that when you do face sadness, I'll be there to brighten your day."

"Yue?" she softly said while leaning from the embrace slightly to look up into his moonlight eyes.  "You are too good for me."  

"So you say," he responded quickly.  "So you say.  But do you ever once consider," he said in a deceptively seductive voice, cupping her face as if he was going to kiss her again, "that you are too good for this world?"

Sakura chuckled.  "Of course!"  She flashed him one of her killingly sweet smiles.  "If anything, you're too good for this world, Yue!  I mean, have you looked yourself lately?  You remind me of an angel… a guardian angel.  Something so special that it shouldn't even exist in this world, but you do—you do exist, which all the more miraculous.  If you weren't here…" her voice trailed off as her throat tightened with emotions.  

"I'll be here for you," he affirmed strongly.  "You don't need to worry about that."

"Then was my premonition wrong?  I saw you… I saw you about to jump… No, you were jumping---" her voice faltering like if she continued the reality would come crashing down onto her.  "I must have been wrong, you're too strong to do anything of that sort.  Yes, that was silly.  It must have been a nightmare in the day, that would make it a day-mare, wouldn't it?" she laughed uncomfortably at her little word play, searching his expression for some kind of gauge of what he was thinking.  

It pained Yue to see her try to convince herself that he hadn't been about to kill himself.  It killed him inside a little see the worry, the anxiety in her body movements, her body language.  If there was one thing fault in Sakura was that she was as readable as a book, as open as knowledge is if one cared to search for it.  But that was the thing he loved about her, her honesty, her integrity, her truth, and most of all—that she was innocent of evil and corruption that he saw daily in himself.  

"Yes, I was just silly, eh?" she nudged him in the side with her elbow.

"What?" he asked, startled from his thoughts.

"My premonition… of you jumping," she clarified when she realized the strange tone in his voice had to do with being out of this world for a bit.  

"No," he admitted truthfully, "your premonition was correct.  I jumped."

Sakura's eyes widened in surprise, then shock, and finally terror and complete dismay.  "But why?" she asked in a voice that was filled with uncertainty.  "Why would you do such a thing?  It can't be because of— but… I must have done something, didn't I?  I'm sorry that I hurt you, Yue.  Perhaps, I should leave.  I should let you go, shouldn't I?  I was right before, wasn't I?  That I harm you by being close to you."

"No, that isn't true," he answered while grabbing her arm to prevent her from running away from him.  "You only hurt me when you aren't near me," he spoke quietly, but with truth.  "I was being unreasonable then.  I was trying to keep up with my training you see," he explained, coming up with a lame excuse that both of them knew wasn't true but needed to believe at least for now, "diving is good for my wing strength."

"Oh," Sakura said, though she knew that he wasn't telling her the truth, "I see.  But it's dangerous.  Next time, let me know so I can catch you with Windy if you want to do such serious training," she reminded him with a cheerful smile, though there was a strain of worry in her voice.

"I will," he reassured her.  "Sakura… I…"

"Yes, Yue?" she said his name so sweetly that it sent a rush of hot blood into his head, thinking that perhaps now would be the perfect time to confess his love for her.  His eternal vow of love that he felt grow stronger over every minute of every day.  But, what if he were rejected again?  "Yue?"

"Sakura… I…"

"Sakura!" yelled Kero, flying into the room at breakneck speed.  "There's someone at the door!"

Yue felt like sinking into oblivion.  He didn't doubt that he knew who it was.  It could only be one person.  He had been lucky to reach here first, which was why he had dared to fly out in the open looking like a lost but frantic angel.  He had taken a chance that he might have been discovered even though it had been a risk well taken.  Now, he felt again that his hope was slipping away much like his dream already felt lost to him.  

"Who is it, Kero?" she inquired.  

"I don't know," replied Kero, "but whoever it is, he's tall."  

Sakura shook her long, now grown out cherry brown hair, laughing joyfully.  "Well, let's go see who is then, shall we?" she asked the guardian of the clow book, but also threw a look back to Yue indicating that she'd like him to come as well, knowing that he was an ever eager hermit.  "Yue, are you coming?"

He nodded, following reluctantly behind the two happily chatting away like it was another normal day.  He was relieved that he hadn't told Sakura of his feelings and at the same time disappointed that he hadn't gotten the chance.  "Yes, I'm coming," he answered, giving a half-hearted attempt to smile so that Kero wouldn't ask him all his nosy questions that he bombarded upon him when he could.

He felt a sick, nervous anxiety pass over like a wave of emotion akin to a bone chilling fear waiting for Sakura to open the door.  He didn't have a chance now.  

"Kaiju!" exclaimed an all too familiar voice.  

The sigh of relief coming out of Yue didn't go unnoticed by Kero's fairly perceptive vision.  "What's up?" he questioned with curiosity.  "I know something's up.  You seemed to be showing too much emotion for you anyways, so you might as well tell me.  I know I'm not that especially insightful, so if I'm seeing it—I'm sure Sakura can."  

But their conversation was interrupted by the sound of an aggrieved Touya.  "Owwww!  You really are a kaiju!" he yelled, hobbling around on one leg trying to keep his other foot from getting stomped on by his sweet, though fierce imouto.

"I am not a kaiju!" she screamed back.  "You're the kaiju!"  Touya did the only effective thing he could think of to shut Sakura up, he step aside and showed her the person standing behind him.  "Tomoyo-chan!" she cried out delightfully.  "What are you doing here?"  

Tomoyo lowered her eyes for a brief second, blushing lightly as she kept sending furious glances toward Touya before grabbing his hand and pulling him to her side.  Sakura caught all this and threw her best friend a clear question mark of what's going on here?  If anything, Tomoyo started turning that much redder.  "Me and Touya are… well, you see we're sort of…," she glared for a second time at Touya.  "Why can't you tell her?"

"Because you wanted to tell her," he reminded her.

"Well, we're kind of…"

"Dating," finished Touya for Tomoyo.  

"What?!" shouted Sakura and Kero at the same time.  Sakura's voice was happy, though surprised—she was delighted.  Kero, on the other hand was almost in disbelief, not wanting to believe his favorite person, other than Sakura was dating his biggest, well second biggest enemy!  "Why didn't you tell me sooner?" asked Sakura with a smile plastered on her face of pure happiness.  

"Well…" started off Tomoyo, "we didn't start really going out until about a month ago."

Touya nodded with the confirmation of the truth.  "We didn't even know it would work out at first, so we didn't want to tell you to get your hopes up too high and then have us break up.  But we think we're going to be just fine together," he added, pulling Tomoyo close to his side.  

"I couldn't be happier!" Sakura pounced onto them, hugging both tightly.  

It was then that Touya noticed Yue standing in the background, a deep shadow surrounded him in an almost bleak manner.  It reminded him of a scene with Yukito, but he didn't like to think of his old friend now, especially with the way they had parted.  He was quite sure that the good-byes had injured Yukito far more than it had him, and he had never intended to hurt his still best friend in the world.  

"I know you're looking at me," Yue finally spoke, lifting his head.  

"Yes, I was looking at you—staring at you actually," Touya told him honestly.  "I was remembering the past.  You do resemble Yukito in ways that I hadn't noticed before."  

"Maybe because you haven't been looking that hard," he informed Touya simply.  "What I was, I always am."  

Touya narrowed his eyes, peering down onto Yue with discerning eyes, almost like he knew him too well.  But his stance relaxed and he asked, "I wonder, was Yukito's personality ever influenced by you?"

"His nature was influenced by his environment.  But as he was created as a part of me, I suppose in everything created a part of the creator is placed within it," Yue explained.  

"Yes, I suppose that is true," he reluctantly accepted.  "But were your feelings concerning… me the same as his?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Because I ask," he answered bluntly.  "Because I need to know."

Yue hesitated to respond to his question, but remembering what he had said to Eriol earlier gave him a bit of courage, at least less reservations.  "Even though you ask me, it is not the same as I am Yukito.  Yukito was me, but Yukito being me was not I being Yukito, do you understand?  It's like how some things are others, but the others can't be those some things."  

"Yes, that makes sense," Touya replied, "but you still haven't answered my question."

"The way I feel for you is not what Yukito felt for you," he said gravely, half of his long mane covering his face.  "It's different, though there is emotion."  

"Yue?" 

"Yes, Touya-san?"

"If I ever need to talk about Yukito, I can come to you right?  I don't think Sakura would understand…" Touya shifted his line of vision to where Sakura and Tomoyo were noticeably chatting about the new relationship developments.  "I know she wouldn't understand, well not in the way I need her to.  She'd be sympathetic, but in the end, I'm not quite sure she'd really get it.  And you were there watching us like a voyeur the entire time, so you'd be able to provide insight no one else could, right?" the tone of his voice was hopeful and slightly pleading like he needed Yue to say yes to his request.  

Yue also thought that Touya underestimated Sakura's sensitivity and empathy levels, but he kept that opinion strictly to himself.  Much like he kept a lot of things close to his heart, not to be disclosed.  "yes, you can talk about Yukito to me any time you want.  Just call first and don't startle Kero into screaming, please."  

"No problem.  But that wasn't my fault," Touya added.  

Yue raised his eyebrow in question, requiring an answer to contradict his belief.  

"Tomoyo insisted that we tell Sakura."

"That would be for the best," Yue agreed.  

"Yes, but…" Touya's voice trailed off, knowing the inner struggles somewhat, but not comprehending all that Yue saw and kept to himself.  

"It will be okay.  In the end, all things will be okay."  

**Author's Note:**  I don't know how consistently I'll be able to keep these updates because I'll be switching between Reminiscent and this fanfic but I did this one first because I had peculiar inspiration.  It came easily and it came long, if you guys hadn't noticed this chapter is a good 700 words longer than the rest.  I now have Calculus AB, US History, English, and Spanish that are all AP's so I'm going to be VERY busy during the weekdays (when I normally write).  I also have a Hamlet analyze persuasion/tone essay due Monday, but I did this first like an idiot, which leads into a Shakespeare imagery research paper –shivers- I'm going to die.  Anyhow, you know the drill leave a review with your email if you want me to tell you about the next update.  And _please review_, I've noticed the reviews have dropped off as the series has continued… do you want this series or not?


	5. Testing Waters

Title:  **A Sweet Blossoming**

Author:  Yih

Written:  January 2002

Disclaimer:  All rights of characters are exclusively Clamp.  

Visit my website here: http://www.seiki.f2s.com 

Yue watched Touya smile at him softly with understanding before walking away.  He sighed slightly, wondering of what might have been then shaking his head firmly.  That was definitely not meant to be, anymore than it looked like he was suppose to be with Sakura.  He hated getting melancholy, but as much as he loved her innocence—it was extremely frustrating that she didn't quite comprehend his motives.  

"Bravo!" called out a strangely familiar voice which was accompanied by a single, soft clap.  

Yue twisted his head around, narrowing his eyes sharply wondering why he heard that particular voice.  Especially considering the owner of that voice, he hadn't expected to see that person again so soon.  In fact, he didn't want to see that person ever again if he could help it.  Obviously, that was not going to be easy considering the circumstances that that person was actually here.  

"Come out, I know you're here," he called out.  

"Bravo!  Really such great advice, Yue.  I didn't know you have it in you.," exclaimed the voice mockingly, clapping twice as loud and as much as last time.  "Here I was thinking you were just one of those isolated hermits that liked to keep to themselves.  I guess, I was sadly mistaken on my assumptions.  But," the voice perked up, "I'm back.  So I can make even better suppositions to your new change in personalities."  

"Where are you?" grumbled Yue in question.  

"Bravo Yue!"  

This time the thrice claps came like the sound of thunder bolts, and Yue could have sworn it came from behind him.  He whirled around only to be confronted by nothing, well the scenery of Sakura's beautiful garden, but not what he was expecting to see.  He had thought he'd see an animated object instead of just air, grass, and more green, green grass.  His eyes narrowed even more as he focused his keen hearing on trying to figure out the location of the hidden person.  

"Really Yue, you're getting slow," chastised the voice.    
Now, he knew precisely where the voice was coming from.  He turned around slowly, this time quite sure the owner of the voice was going no where.  He didn't know exactly who he was expecting, the tone of words reminded him of who he thought it was--- and turned out to be, but the voice had sounded different enough to make him second guess his judgment.  

"Ruby!  What are you doing here?" 

"Well, what do you think?" she asked exasperatedly.  "Eriol's here," she explained as she would explain to a simpleton, "of course, I'd be here as well.  I'm his guardian after all.  Or have you forgotten that in the idleness of what your life has become?  I mean, you would have never have found me, Yue if I hadn't wanted you to find me.  You knew it as well, taking your sweet time to turn around."  

Yue clenched his fist, knowing all too well that his nemesis knew how to push his buttons in all the right ways.  "Why did you come here?" he stressed on the final word.  "Why did you come here at all?  You know you presence isn't welcomed here."  

"Aww… Yue," murmured Ruby silkily, "so harsh as usual."  She sighed pleasantly, her arms thrown into the air with a gleeful smile on her lips.  "You remind of the old times.  You do remember, that you were my example… the one that I followed so diligently.  The prime reminder of what I was suppose to be.  Unfortunately, I outdid you, didn't I Yue?  The proof is clearly there.  We might have only been co-students for a short time, but Clow Reed did prepare us to be his next guardians, while you--- Yue and Kero, the first, but the perfected guardians were left to find a new, inferior Master."  

Her words grated on his ears, the fury building up within the chambers of his heart.  He grabbed Ruby by her throat and pushed her body up against the tree roughly, not caring if she suffered a bruise or even two.  The chill in his voice, the undertone of being pushed too far was emphasized with each intonation he pronounced, "You have gone too far, Ruby.  Clow Reed chose Sakura for his successor to the Clow Cards; she is in no way inferior to him.  She is his equal in every level and every way.  You and Spinel might have been Clow Reed's chosen guardians for his reincarnation, but that in no way indicates anything about Kero's and my abilities.  Perhaps, we were chosen because we could handle the gravity of having a new master, unlike you."  

Ruby started laughing, sharp and high pitched breaking through the stillness in the air after Yue's rather fierce exclamation.  "Really Yue, if I didn't know better you are implying that Sakura is superior to Clow Reed, which you know isn't so.  But I could expect no less when you harbor intentions of being together with you fair, fair mistress.  Don't you want to be with in that way Yue?  Of course, you had same feelings for Clow Reed.  So it's only natural you would have those loving feelings for Sakura, isn't it?  Everything follows a pattern, a circle, a rhythm."  

He tightened his grip on her throat to shut her up as much as to stop her laughing, his own throat convulsing with his anger.  "Be quiet, Ruby.  You speak of things you cannot comprehend," he whispered harshly.  "How could?  You are just a vain, jealous, and insipid guardian.  Even Kero is gifted with a caring and comforting nature, but you are just callous and cunning."  

"And you would be cold and cynical.  I'd say my faults are better than your flaws," Ruby replied smoothly, her eyebrow arching up with bemusement.  "You can't deny that you were that.  You were one that it wouldn't work, from all that Eriol has told us, has allowed to see.  Oh Yue, you don't think that Eriol didn't know what going on in that judgment, did you?  After all he sent Kaho there to personally secure Sakura's position as the new mistress of the Clow Cards.  Poor Yue, you cannot even do your job right.  Poor Yue, you were the discarded guardian."  

"Ruby," he said menacing, nearly choking the other moon guardian, "you are pushing into a place you'd rather not be.  You may be immortal, but choking you to death would still kill you.  We are only gifted with the ability to stay eternal if we don't get ourselves killed."

"I—I'd think… twice about—doing what you're… doing," Ruby said in staggers of words.  "Think--- think of… the consequences—the guilt… the guilt."  

He loosened his hold on her neck enough that she drew a ragged breath into her aching lungs, giving her enough of a revival to smile sweetly at Yue.  "You know if I'd known it only took making you mad to touch me, I'd do it a lot more.  You know I like you, Yue."  

The words were perfection on Ruby's cunning ability to judge scenarios, Yue dropped his hand from her throat as if he had just been burned by a scorching fire.  He quickly stepped away from her, while she laughed and laughed away her wicked sense of amusement.  He turned away from her and proceeded to walk toward the house when he felt Ruby's arms wrap around his waist in such a manner that made him freeze and feel internally sick inside.  

"You know Yue," she whispered seemingly romantically into his ear, "my words were only a joke.  But I can't help it.  Especially when there's this absolutely delectable creature staring at us with her exquisite, vibrantly green saucer eyes.  Yes, I can't help but do this when she's around because I know it positively infuriates you.  And I do like making you mad, maddening because I like watching your coldness turn into such hot-temperedness.  Really, you're much more interesting when you're being your normally moody and broody self, you know… Yue."  

Yue whipped his long silvery hair around, hitting Ruby in the face, moving his face to the direction she was gazing at intently, meeting the confusion in Sakura's eyes.  Their was a bewilderment and something fuzzy, like she was hurt seeing this scene.  For a moment, Yue was fiercely glad that Sakura might be jealous at this scenario, but then he immediately damned his emotion.  He didn't want to hurt Sakura no matter what.  He hated to put her through anymore pain than she had already been through.  Especially since he knew better than one what was causing her such unbearable pain.  He had been, the voyeur, watching it all through clear lens.  

"Yue?" asked Sakura, her eyes widening even more with shock.  "Ruby?  Why are you here?  Why are two… together?"  The astonishment and the faint tinge of a sad emotion was evident in her voice.  But she suppressed the feeling, much as Yue always pushed down his feelings for her.  "Tea's ready.  Would you two like to come into the house?"  

The way she said 'two' made Yue cringe mentally.  He was sure that the smiling Ruby with her arms still wrapped around his waist was enjoying every minute of this torture.  He wanted to squeeze his fellow moon guardian's neck once again, but much as Sakura was able to repress her emotions, he could at least try to be civil with Ruby.  As soon as Sakura turned around, he jerked Ruby's arms off of him and pushed her aside, closing the distance between him and Sakura with his long strides.  He grabbed by the wrist before she re-entered the house.  

"Wait, Sakura… please," he begged, waiting for her to look at him before he continued, "It's not what it seems.  She was just being Ruby," he explained.  "She likes annoying the hell out of me, actually.  Kero and Spinel could give you likewise stories on her infantile behavior.  It wasn't anything.  She doesn't mean anything to me."  

"But she," began Sakura with insight, "might feel something for you?  Didn't a wise woman once say that those that annoy you the must really love you?  The words do seem to make sense.  After all, I think I did impede the one who…" her voice trailed off while her throat closed itself to the sorrow gathering there.  

"Sakura," whispered Yue, still holding her wrist, "I… I'll be there for you.  No matter what, you know that don't you?"  

She smiled that beautiful smile he loved so much about her.  "I know.  You're my guardian angel, aren't you?"

He released her arm.  "Yes," he answered solemnly watching her disappear into the house.  "Yes, I'm your guardian angel."  

"Hmmm… and things just keep getting much more interesting," Ruby murmured to herself, staring at the broken moment with a soft, understanding, and contemplative smile.  "Now, if you had only confessed… that would suited the situation far better.  Oh Yue, you foolish, foolish man, you can't see what's so obvious to other eyes.  She does feel something for, don't you see that?  There was jealousy in her eyes; there was fear of what our relationship might be.  She's drawing assumptions and guesses, and that makes things…" 

"Ruby," called out a voice from above.    

"Yes, Suppy?" she replied quickly, tilting her head up into the sky to see her partner descend from the air.  "Ooh!  Such a flashy entrance that I didn't think you were capable of.  Isn't Master usually the one that goes for such theatrical antics?  Are trying to copy his style?  Such a pity, you can't pull it off."  

Spinel grumbled and growled at Ruby, but said nothing about her nickname of him.  He had tired of that argument long ago, and he already knew she was never going to change.  "Master is coming soon.  We must prepare for his return.  Have you inspected the mansion yet?"  

"Of course not," Ruby responded, "that's your job.  Besides, I was too busy having a little bit of fun."  

"Mischief is more like it," retorted Spinel.  

"But it was mischief I ordered her to do," answered a voice for Ruby.  "It was easier than doing it myself."  

"Master!" cried out both of his guardians in unison.  "We didn't think you were coming until later!  You said you had things that you needed to retrieve from England and settle some business there before returning again, which is why you sent us here," said Ruby.  "Have you changed your mind?  You aren't sending us back are you?  I did what you asked… though I might have taken some liberties.  But it was all for a good--"  

"No," Eriol said, interrupting her, "I'm not sending you back.  You did very well Ruby.  I've been watching you.  And yes, there was some business that I had to settle but I've gotten Kaho to do it for me.  She's better at it than I am anyways, being more organized and less magically inclined.  And as you said to yourself, thinking that you were alone… things just keep getting much more interesting.  How could I leave?  Especially if I hope… for the impossible."  

"It isn't impossible, Master," she declared loyally.  

"Of course it isn't," agreed Spinel.  "You are far superior than Yue."  

"It isn't a matter of superiority," reproved Eriol.  "It's a matter of Yue being there for her in her greatest need when the one she loved left her.  It really is as simple as that.  And I probably stayed away too long, far, far too long."  

"With our help," Ruby stated confidently, "you will have Sakura for you own.  I will stake my life on it."  

"And mine as well."  

"You two don't need to be as loyal as that," Eriol chided, smiling though with warmth after hearing their faithful words.  "Though it indeed warms my heart.  You two are not to interfere unless I ask of it.  There's no other way to win Sakura's heart other than to… win it fair and square.  You've done your duty Ruby with Yue, now I nee you and Spinel to prepare the mansion.  We have some entertaining to do."  

Ruby grinned.  "I know exactly what you mean.  Suppy!" she cried out, grabbing the sun guardian by the ear.  "Let's get to work right now!  I don't know how long it will take to clean up that mansion until it's sparkling and delightful as it ever was!  And I'll need your brute strength to do it!"  

Spinel sent a pained look toward Eriol who watched while Ruby dragged the poor guardian in the direction of his mansion.  He glanced then to Sakura's house, a tender expression on his face.  He sighed softly whispering to himself, "I've changed Sakura since the last time you saw me.  But will being who I am prevent you from seeing me as something more?  I've felt this emotion of love for you for the longest time.  And I suppose there's only one way to find out how you feel about me, even if I'm the loser and the one more gravely hurt afterwards."  

He bent his head down, smiling as he picked a wildflower from the field.  He lifted his head and putting one foot in front of the other, walked toward the door of where behind it was the person that had the ability to determine his fate.  All he had known up before was nothing and now he had everything to learn.  Life, lessons, and love… all that have been taught and to be taught by one very special young woman.  

"For the desired gain, there must be the dangerous risk."   

**Author's Note:** I had the inspiration to write this from 5 to 6 than from 7 to 8 than from 9 to 10.  It took 3 hours of going off and on and then coming up with the perfect ending for this chapter.  It was longer than I expected.  I've been aiming for 2,000 but this is about 2,600 and just a shade shorter than the previous chapter.  But hey, the ending was just too good to pass up!  Anyhow, please review… I really appreciate the feedback.  Your comments are a great inspiration!  Every little bit helps tremendously.  Oooh, isn't Ruby just wicked?  I used her in Eternity (my Eriol x Sakura fanfic) and I think I might be overdoing it… but her purpose really is important!  ^_^;;


	6. Another Vision

Title:  **A Sweet Blossoming**

Author:  Yih

Written:  January 2002/ February 2002

Disclaimer:  All rights of characters are exclusively Clamp.  

Visit my website here: http://www.seiki.f2s.com 

"The final step…" he murmured to himself, standing on the idyllic porch.  He stopped himself from knocking on the door, just standing there taking in the breath and courage that he needed to do this.  How he needed the strength to take this undeniable step even if it meant pain.  The smile on his face was poignant and contemplative, the normal Eriol trademarks.  

"I thought you were home."  

He glanced around puzzled until he looked in front at the door.  His eyes widen with surprise and shock, and it was a rarity that one could astonish him.  Even Ruby with all her practical jokes hadn't managed to do that to him since he was elementary in age.  He bit his lip, nearly drawing blood until the exquisite creature studied him with a perplexed expression.  

"You're not my husband, though you seemed like him from the inside," she remarked with a soft, sweet voice.  "I must be losing my touch.  Now that I look you, you don't really remind me of him anymore.  You've got his height and his sweet smile, but that's where the physical similarities end.  It really must have been your smile that drew me out.  Well, you must be one of Sakura's friends, aren't you?"  

Eriol face faulted, incredulous at the least that he was seeing and hearing Sakura's long lost mother.  "Your Sakura's mother?"  

She beamed and nodded.  "Yes.  Are you Syaoran?"  

His throat rumbled uncomfortably as he cleared it.  "No," he answered, "I'm not Syaoran."  

"Then you must…" her voice trailed off as she tried to think of who another of Sakura's friends.  

"I'm Eriol," he introduced himself, bowing reverently.  

"Oh, Eriol!" she cried out with recognition.  "I've heard of you before in some of the hazy conversations, well they were hazy to me at least.  But I have heard your name spoken before, though I'm not quite sure where I heard it.  I think Fujitaka might have spoken of you, something about being able to…" her voice trailed off as she squinted her eyes in an effort to pull back memories that ghosts really don't have in their translucent forms other than that of their past lives, "to… to--"

"To be able to see you freely as you are?" suggested Eriol with a cheerful smile on his face.  "That is what I gifted him with when I came to help your daughter capture the Clow Cards, ultimately becoming the spark that made her change those Clow Cards before they lost their powers into the new Sakura Cards.  That is who I am, part of the reincarnation of Clow Reed, of which your husband is the other half."  

Nadeshiko's mouth opened up with an appreciative noise rumbling in her throat.  "Aww!  That's it!" she exclaimed exuberantly.  "That's why I recognized your name.  I think I can remember that for a while," she murmured delicately, hovering over him like the mother he never had.  "But you really don't resemble my husband that much, even in your physical appearance.  However, you do share his undeniably sweet smile that I love so much about him.  Do you know my husband, Fujitaka?"  

Eriol continued smiling away, knowing full well that her memories of what he had told her drifted in and out and around her mind until finally they'd slip away.  For ghosts had only one thing on their mind, their past and the present and the future were lost in a whirl of endless time that they had for themselves.  In the end, nothing stayed longer than the one thing that kept them on Earth, and for Nadeshiko that was her family—and the main reason was Fujitaka.  

"Yes," he told her gently, "I know your husband."  

"Hmmm," she murmured her hands moving in and out through his skin, "you have a lovely lips.  They look exactly like my husband's lips.  Very chiseled and smooth and perfectly lovely.  Has anyone told you that you have beautiful lips?" she asked pleasantly.  "I'm sure they have; I'm sure there's several girls that you've already kissed that have already have told you of this very thing!  You must be one of Sakura's friends… and here I am chattering away with you.  Go ahead," she urged, "ring the doorbell."  

He didn't even have to go that far before Sakura opened the door for him before he even had the chance to press his finger against the doorbell.  His eyes opened wide with surprise as Sakura's head peeked out.  Her face glanced up at him, his tall figure a silhouette against her bent form that was searching for something or someone.  Her mouth opened up with a shock that surpassed Eriol's own.

But her greeting was joyful.  "Eriol!" she exclaimed.  "I haven't seen you in years!  And here I thought it was Kero trying to play another trick at me.  Or that it was squirrel or bird that had gotten in trouble," she ruefully admitted, "because we've had a bit of an incident with the animals recently.  A bird actually flew into the house and got trapped, and oniichan ran over a squirrel with his motorcycle."  

"Really?" he queried.  His eyes caught up between the two visions before him, one his heart and the other his love's mother.  Now similar they looked, and yet how different they might be since he didn't really know Nadeshiko for what she really was.  It took him a few seconds of glancing between them, utterly astonished before he realized he was ignoring Sakura.  He finally said, "Now that is something different.  I'm sure things have been really lively here."  

"They have!" she eagerly agreed.  "Ack!  I've been talking to you out on the porch when I should be asking whether you'd like to come in or not!  I'm quite forgetful at times," she confessed, stepping aside to allow him to enter.  "Would you like to come in, Eriol?"

He nodded and shuffled in next to her, slightly surprise to find himself not quite towering over her, but tall compared to her.  She cranked her neck up at an angle and declared, "You really have grown since the last time I've seen you, Eriol.  May I ask what brings you into the neighborhood?  I'm hoping it's not for business because I'd really like to have sometime to catch up with you.  It'd be wonderful if you were here on a vacation."  

He'd like to have told her it was _her_, that was the reason he was in the neighborhood.  He'd like to have told her he was here only for _her,_ and it wasn't business.  And there was no other reason but _her.  _But he didn't tell her, instead he kept on smiling cheerfully and gestured with his arm for her to lead the way into what direction she wanted to direct him.  He had a feeling he'd be seeing Yue very, very shortly.  

But he couldn't help but glance back one last time to see Sakura's okaasan waving enthusiastically at him, saying good-bye quite happily.  He never knew how Sakura had gotten through without having an okaasan, even with a loving otousan and oniichan like she had.  He hadn't had one himself, but he considered Sakura ethereal and fragile that it made him ache inside to imagine the loneliness of not having a maternal figure.  

It was only when Sakura tugged on his sleeve that he realized he had been ignoring her for the second time, caught up in his thoughts.  She leaned up against him, an understanding smile on her face and she glanced over his shoulder.  "You've seen my okaasan, haven't you?  Is she as beautiful as the photos?"  

Eriol was about to ask her where the photos were when Sakura whirled away from him and threw her arms up in the air, catching his eyes toward the movement which drew itself to the portraits and pictures on the walls.  Several of them were of Touya and Sakura as children, and as they were growing up—but others were of a breathtaking young woman photographed everywhere.  "She is as beautiful as the photos, if not more so," he responded honestly, his eyes filled with awe as he circled around the amazing hallway.  He was taken back by how much each photograph captured.  

"My otousan," Sakura began, "loves taking photos.  He is really good at what he does, even though it's only a hobby.  This is how I know my okaasan.  Each of his pictures has such meaning that by looking at them, I begin to understand her personality and what she loves.  Even now, looking at them for the millionth time I can see something new about them that I never have before."  

Sakura was staring at picture of her okaasan under a cherry blossom tree with the most fascinated look at her okaasan blowing away the fragile blooms when a soft voice murmured, "I wondered when you were going to make your presence known to her."  Both Eriol and Sakura turned away from the photo and glanced at the magnificent aura of Yue.  He continued, his voice smoothly dangerous, "Now that you're here, may I talk with you privately?"  

Eriol nodded and moved away from his position next to Sakura and followed Yue into Fujitaka's study.  He was barely in the room when Yue lifted his hands up menacingly, as if to send a beam of magic at his reincarnated former master, but he simply shut the door with a loud bang.  A slow, silky smile curved his lips up in a strangely sinister look before his smile faltered and he said carefully, "There is much that we need to talk about."  

"Master should be very pleased," remarked Spinel, watching Ruby polish off the last bit of the room with a rag instead of her special brand of magic.  

"And of course, I can tell him—you didn't help me!" she yelled into his ear loudly.  She grinned impishly as he jumped up to his feet.  "You're so lazy, it's a pity Suppy."  

Spinel glared at Ruby, but said nothing.  Instead, he decided to ask the question that had been lingering in his mind the past few hours.  "What did master ask you to do?" he inquired.  "Why wasn't I told?"  His voice plainly a little hurt that he hadn't been aware of what was going on, not jealous at her assignment, just wondering why he hadn't been told of it.  

Ruby sighed, rubbing Spinel's head in a reassuring way.  "Well, I think he didn't tell you because he was so anxious and busy planning so many things.  He told me what he wanted me to do scarcely an hour before he sent me here.  So I didn't have enough time to tell you the tidbits," she told Spinel apologetically.  "I'm sure it's nothing at all.  Besides, I was better at this sort of job than you are.  You'd probably end up playing a chess game with Yue when you're suppose to upset him.  I'm not quite sure why master wanted me to upset him, but I did my job as he asked with little improvisations on my part."  

"Typical Ruby," Spinel muttered beneath his breath.  

"Hey!" she cried out, throwing the rag on his head.  "I was being nice to you!"  

"I know, I'm grateful," he murmured, smiling.  "I think it's rather amusing that we get along so well when master isn't it here."  

"That's only because I like to rile up the master up a little," Ruby remarked.  "It makes things much more interesting.  And it gets him out of his shell of his.  It's good for him to show some emotion now and then, even if it is annoyance.  Sometimes, I think that he goes so deeply underneath his skin and hides himself that we can't even touch him.  But then again there are times that I think we're his best friends."  

Spinel purred his agreement.  "Yes, we are.  And this mansion, sparkly clean will please him very much.  It's been a while since we've seen that happy smile on his face.  Quite a while, I'll be overjoyed myself to see it.  The only thing I'm curious about is why  he had you provoke Yue like that.  It's not his usual style to go around making people mad, and he was right to chose you.  You do try people's patience."  

She chuckled and squeezed Spinel's cheeks.  "I know you're just jealous that I can get a reaction out of person, while you can only bore them to death with your boring attendance.  And you know it, that's why you're trying so hard to make me feel bad about my skills when I should be flaunting them daily!"  

Spinel rolled his eyes and grumbled, "That was a short lived truce."  

"So what do you want to talk about?"  

**Author's Note:** I'm sure you guys are dying to know what Yue and Eriol want to talk about, so we'll talk about later =).  I think I'm getting quite good at cliffhangers =).  Anyhow, the situation's changed on getting "chapter email alerts" from me.  If you still want them I can email you an invitation to my emailing group or you can send an email here to subscribe: sakurafanfics-subscribe@yahoogroups.com   As always, your comments and questions are totally appreciative, and I do reply to reviews occasionally if I'm not busy working on the next part.  If you want a response, tell me =)  I really do enjoy your views and they help me know what you guys like.  Thanks!  Ja ne!  


	7. Faded Flower

Title:  **A Sweet Blossoming**

Author:  Yih

Written:  February 2002/ March 2002

Disclaimer:  All rights of characters are exclusively Clamp.  

Visit my website http://seiki.envy.nu and Please Review!  

7: Faded Flower

"Everything," Yue responded.  "I want to talk about everything."  

"Everything is rather a dense subject," answered Eriol with an amused smile, "perhaps you might be a little more specific.  Is it about why I'm here all of sudden?  Or is it because of your feelings with Sakura, the love you have for her?  Maybe it's something else, maybe it's the jealousy and envy in your heart?  Come now, Yue, you use to tell me everything, didn't you once?"  

Yue turned away from Eriol, giving him his back deliberately.  "That was when you were a different person," Yue retorted.  "You aren't quite the same anymore."  

"Oh, but that's not what you said when you first recognized me again.  You said I was 'Clow Reed'.  I felt truly that was the most wondrous compliment anyone had ever spoken to me.  And to come from the lips of my beloved Yue was even more satisfying.  And I will answer the questions I know that you won't ask.  Why am I here?  It's a good thing I did come, since you nearly jumped to your death.  In ways Yue, I care for you even more than I did as Clow Reed.  I've seen the way you've grown with Sakura and it's made me very happy," he murmured, reaching out to trace his fingers down Yue's cheek.  "But in ways it pains me since somehow Sakura has carved a place for herself in my heart.    
"I'm not quite sure when she began to enthuse her way into my soul, but she did so in the same way she did to you.  Unintentionally, infinitely forever," he whispered softly, "and it's a marvelous feeling isn't it, Yue?  To be in love with such a fervor that I know is thumping, beating, and coursing through your heart and veins right now.  I'm feeling it myself.  I know you're jealous of the one Sakura holds dearest and also envious of him, but I feel that those emotions are turning toward me.  And I've always been on your side, Yue."  

The moon guardian's breathing picked up as Eriol's finger touched his lips.  He jerked his face away from the reincarnation of Clow Reed and bowed his head down, saying hoarsely, "I cannot believe you are on my side when you are here to claim Sakura for your very own.  How can I believe it when Ruby and Spinel are here to assist you in the endeavor?  You said so yourself when you saved me from my release that you were here for Sakura and that you love her for your very own!  How am I believe you are on my side when you want to take away what I hold dearest in my heart?"  

"Are you on my side?"  

"Yes," Yue murmured under his breath.

"That's how I'm on your side," Eriol said softly, framing his hands around Yue's face to lift it up.  "That's why I'm on your side.  Even now, you cannot hate me when you need to hate me.  It would make things so much easier on you Yue if you'd just hate me a little, as you said earlier and which I don't think you really mean, you said I'm not the same person as Clow Reed.  That I am different.  Would that make it easier for you to feel some dislike toward me if that was so?"

"No," Yue choked out, "no, it would not.  Because as you said yourself, I didn't really mean it.  And you knew it as well.  But I love her, Eriol, I love her so much, Clow Reed.  I love her so much it makes me ache to feel the pain that still resides within her soul.  I know it's still there and I'd do anything if I could to erase it.   But I can't anymore.  I can't go back anymore especially when he never knew--- he never knew.  He saw someone else instead."  

"Yes," agreed Eriol, "he saw someone else that he wanted more than life itself.  And when he knew that he could not receive the love he gave so freely, it destroyed him.  He was a beautiful soul, sweet and trusting.  In ways, he was quite like the Yue you never show Sakura.  If only you'd show it, I'd not stand a chance with Sakura.  You know better than anyone what you hide within you."  

Walking up and down the length of the room, Yue turned and turned around Eriol.  He was restless with nervous energy and the blossoming of hope within him once again.  He wanted to curse Eriol for giving him such a hope, when he was going to crush it later.  He believed Eriol was on his side, and it didn't pain him to realize that his friend, once his mentor and master was now his rival for the affection of the one he loved so dearly.  And it did hurt him if he thought too hard on it.  But whatever he did, he was not able to hate Eriol, and he did try.  He wasn't even able to dislike Ruby, however irritating and annoying she was.  

"You sent Ruby to try to make me dislike her with her annoying ability to push all my wrong buttons?" asked Yue suddenly.  "You sent her to push me over the edge, but why?" he inquired, standing face to face, eye to eyes with Eriol.  "Why did you do that?"  

"I thought it'd make thinks easier on you," Eriol remarked.  "I guess my assumptions and guesses aren't quite like they use to be.  It's not like I can see into the future anymore.  I gave that up quite a while back.  If you were able to dislike Ruby for a second, maybe you might be able to dislike me as well.  But I misjudged that incorrectly.  She did spur you into a bit of violence though.  I've never seen you quite like that.  Some of things that she said were quite cruel on her part, and I don't quite agree with them either.  Though she did do her job rather admirably especially when I told her without clear instructions to rile you up."  

"So you were watching all through it?"

"Yes, but I never expected that Sakura was going to come out when she did or how Ruby was going to interact.  But the look on her face Yue.  She cares for you.  If she only looked that way at me, I'd never leave her side again.  I don't think I stand much of a chance against you.  Rather you yourself stand the greatest menace to your chance with Sakura.  I only want you to be happy Yue.  It's true that I want nothing more than to be with Sakura, but I'm not one to deny destiny.  I foresaw and foretold your fate with Sakura in my lifetime ago.  And I want you both to be happy.  My creation and my prodigy, who wouldn't?"  

Yue slumped down, crumbling to his knees while Eriol wrapped his arms around the moon guardian's shoulders.  Eriol hugged him tightly and whispered into his ears, "I believe that Sakura might just love you as much as she loved him.  But you don't believe it, that's why you hesitate, isn't it?  You don't believe she can care that deeply for you.  I don't think you want to believe it.  You like being almost safe in your utter adoration of her and your obsessive love.  It gives you a haven, a sort of heaven to escape to.  If she doesn't deny you, you can live in your fantasy forever, can't you?

"That's why I'm here.  If you don't want to make the step to claim her for yourself.  I'll do it.  I'll make her mine, but with regrets because she was suppose to be yours."  

"I haven't seen Eriol-kun in the longest time!" exclaimed Tomoyo.  "I wonder what he looks like now," she wondered with stars in her eyes causing Touya to elbow her affectionately, "but I'm sure that you're ten times more heavenly than he is now."  

"Only ten times?" he remarked, sounding aggrieved.  "I thought you once said to me that I was at least one hundred times more good-looking than any guy you'd seen."  

"Oh, well Eriol's different," Tomoyo explained, "he's a sorcerer like Sakura, so he gets bonus points.  That reminds me, Sakura, how do you really feel about me and Touya dating and all?  I mean I'd like nothing--- we'd like nothing more than for you to be utterly supportive of our relationship.  You are such an important person to both of us.  We never did quite finish that happy greeting before."  

Sakura beamed at both of them.  "Why wouldn't I be?  I was a bit astonished though in the beginning, but I thought I reacted in a positive fashion."  

"You did," Tomoyo and Touya replied in unison.  

"I always suspected that you had a crush on Touya," Sakura declared, winking at her best friend.  "But I never thought it lasted this long.  I first thought you had a crush on him when we were ten years old!  That was nearly ten years ago!  Time does seem to fly by since we finally caught all the Clow Cards, then going through Judgment, and then finally meeting Eriol and transforming them into the Sakura Cards, huh?"  

"Yes, it does," agreed Tomoyo.   

"So," Sakura began, "did you ask him out or did he ask you out?"

Tomoyo blushed prettily.  "I asked your niichan out."  She gazed seductively at Touya.  "He's quite shy about it."

Reaching over to tickle her, he growled affectionately, kissing her on the nose.  "She's lying actually, imouto.  We actually tried to ask each other out at the same time," he remembered.  "It was very confusing.  We didn't quite get what the other was saying because I think we were both too nervous about what we were actually saying to comprehend what the other person was saying."  

She shook her head vigorously.  "I knew all along what he was saying," she declared to Sakura.  "I was too overjoyed to respond to his question so he explained it again.  Then I yelled at him, 'I'm asking you out too!'  Your niichan blushes quite prettily, Sakura.  I wish I could have gotten it on video," she reflected regretfully.  "It was quite a moment.  But I remember it as if it were yesterday."  

"As do I, so if you ever forget I can remind you," Touya teased.  "I hope you wouldn't since it's also our anniversary day."  

"I might once in a while," she joked seriously before Touya pulled her over to him and kissed her firmly on the lips.  

"You will not forget," he commanded.  

"I will."

He kissed her again.  "You will not."

"I will not."  

Sakura turned her head away from the affectionate display, unbeknownst to them.  She looked out the window where the flower petals fell.  _He loves me.  _She continued watching as more petals fell.  _He loves me not.  _All she saw were the petals falling.  _He loves me. _ All the petals seemed to be falling.  _He loves me not.  _And another petal fell.  _He loves me.  _The flower was almost barren now.  _He loves me not.  _The last petal fell.  _He loves me.  _

"Sakura?" asked Tomoyo worriedly.  

But Sakura was lost in her own vision of falling flower petals.  

"He loves me not."  

**Author's Note:**  Please Review that would mean a lot to me.  Reviews really have slacked off and it kind of makes me thing no one wants to read this anymore.  Anyways, enjoy this edition.  ^-^ and I'll see you next time depending when I get my allotted reviews before writing again.  Ja ne!  And leave an email in your review if you want to join the mailing list.  


	8. Long Ago Story

Title:  **A Sweet Blossoming**

Author:  Yih

Written:  April 2002/ May 2002

Disclaimer:  All rights of characters are exclusively Clamp.  

Visit my website http://seiki.envy.nu and Please Review!  

8: Long Ago Story 

And so he went away.  

He went to the edge of a cliff and waited for her.  When she came, he told her his story.  He told her he did not love her in the way she deserved to be loved.  The way a woman was supposed to be loved by a man.  He said he was not the man for her, that there was another out there that loved her.  He knew it.  She asked him who.  He only smiled and said that he was nearby.  That the one that loved her was near her side.  But she didn't see.  

And when he went away.

She cried a thousand times.  She had invested her soul into loving him.  She told him that she did not care whether he loved her or not.  She wanted to be with him no matter what.  And he was very close to leaving her and all he cared about and the one that he did love behind.  He smiled sadly and kissed her sweet lips and said, "I don't love you, Sakura."  

And she wept as he held her one last time.  

"I love you as I'd love a sister," he whispered into her ear.  "It's a different kind of love that makes me want to cry when I hear you cry.  Don't cry for me, Sakura.  I need to leave.  I need to leave this place where my dreams became a nightmare.  I love someone else.  I love you only as a sister.  I'm sorry, Sakura.  I have to go now."  

And he pulled away from her.

He dried her tears with his hands, rubbing them away until they stopped spilling from her eyes.  And when her tears stopped, he kissed her forehead and left.  She fell to her knees on the gravel ground, her eyes as arid as the desert.  She did not want to cry for him anymore today.  He did not love her that way.  He did not even love her enough to stay.  

She knew soon enough, she'd cry for him again.  

"Sakura?" asked Tomoyo with concern, holding her best friend tightly.  "Are you okay?"  

"Yes," she replied shakily, her eyes refocusing from her memory into the present.  "I'm fine.  I'll be okay.  I was thinking.  That's all."  

"You were thinking of him again," Touya murmured.  "I know you were, you cannot deny it.  I'm sorry that he wasn't able to make himself stay for you, Sakura.  I'm sorry that I drove him away.  I'm sorry that I caused you that hurt.  I never meant to hurt you.  If I could bring him back, I'd do it now.  You know that, don't you?"  

Sakura smiled and nodded, reaching with her hand to squeeze Touya's comfortingly.  "I know."  

"We're here for you," Tomoyo reminded.  "It's been a year since you last spoke of him, but I know that you still think of him.  I don't have to hear you say anything to know the look in your eyes when you start to remember the memories of him."  

"She still cries over him," Kero inputted solemnly, wrapping himself on top of Sakura's lap.  "She never tells me why.  I always ask, but she won't tell why.  But I know why because he didn't stay even though she begged him.  She thinks everyone will leave her.  He wasn't the only one to leave her.  Three of them have left her in all and she was not able to bear losing him, the last to go.  Especially what he meant to her."  

"Kero," Sakura said in a trembling voice, "you do not know what you speak of."  

"I know that you cry for him before you sleep, and you cry for him while you sleep, and you cry for him when you awake.  You didn't make him leave, Sakura.  It wasn't your fault that he left.  And he is not the only one that loves you.  We all love you."  

Her eyes filled with tears and she flung Tomoyo's arms from her, running up to her room.  Tomoyo and Touya stared down at Kero where he laid on his side, dejectedly.  "I've tried so hard.  I've tried so hard not tell you all what she does everyday.  I've tried so hard to tell myself that she's getting better,  but she's not.  She thinks it's all her fault that he left her.  And she mumbles to herself that she doesn't deserve to cry about him.  Even Yue doesn't know because of his connection to him.  She only reveals it to me.  And I can't hide it anymore.  It's been too hard to watch her tear herself apart."  

He does not love her the way she should be loved by a man.  

He left because he loved another more than he loved her.  He loved her only as much as he loved a sister.  He did not love her at all.  He only told her that because he knew how to make her weep.  But he was a nice gentle soul to her.  He taught her how to cook for college.  He watched her while she slept when the first one left.  He comforted her when the second one left.  And he told her he would always be there.  But he was not always there.  He is gone now.  

He left a year ago.  

And she has not stopped crying since that day.  She cannot understand that he had to leave.  She only knows that he did not love her enough to stay.  She did not do enough to make him want to stay.  She did not tell him she loved him far enough.  He always shushed her when she began to speak.  He told her he knew and that he did not need to be reminded.  But now she thought maybe because she gave in to his request that maybe he thought she did not love him enough to vocalize her love for him.

She has never been the same since.

She felt hopeless then and she feels hopeless now.  She wishes that he would come back to her.  But he cannot return any longer.  And she knows that, but she still wishes that he would.  Every time she sees a falling star, she makes that wish.  

She wishes he would come back to her and love her and never leave her.  

"Sakura, open the door!"  shouted Touya, banging on her door.  

She opened the door and Touya fell in with Tomoyo tumbling down on top of him.  Kero launched himself at Sakura and cried out, "I'm so sorry that I told.  I did not want to tell, but I cannot hold it in no longer.  I don't want you to be sad Sakura.  I love you too much.  I want you to be happy.  I want nothing more than for you to be happy."  

"I know," she said, clutching Kero in her arms.  "I want you to comfort me alone."  She stared down at Touya and Tomoyo.  "I want you to comfort me alone."  

Kero nodded and when she let go of him, he transformed into his true form and pushed Tomoyo and Touya out of the room.  He closed the door and plopped himself down on the rug.  She came to him and lied down next to him, her face resting underneath his chin as he rubbed her back reassuringly as she cried her tears once more.  

"I loved him so much, Kero.  Why did he have to leave me?"  

"I don't know Sakura.  But maybe one day he'll come back."  

They both knew he was never coming back.  But she needed to hear that and she needed to believe that.  All that Kero wanted was his Sakura back the way she had been before he had left her broken hearted.  And maybe given a little more time, she might see that he was not going to come back and that there really was someone that loved her the way she deserved to be loved.  

"I wish he would."  

"That's all you can do is wish and maybe it'll come true."  

"I miss him so much, Kero."  

"I know," he answered warmly, licking her face.  "And there is somebody else that loves you."

"You, I know," she whispered back, snuggling closer into his warmth.  

He rumbled and held her tightly.  "It's not only me, Sakura."  

If Sakura only opened her eyes, he knew she would see how much Yue worshipped her.  He'd tell her if he could, but Yue had sworn him to silence when he had confronted his fellow guardian about it.  That had been nearly half a year ago.  He had watched as Yue watched Sakura, and it ached him to see them both miserable when they had the chance to be happy together in each others arms.  

"Maybe."  

"It's not maybe," he said firmly.  "It is."  

She closed her eyes and the tears fell away from her face.  She clutched Kero's thick mane and allowed herself to drift into a restless sleep that temporarily took her mind away from the distress into a brief nothingness.  But Kero knew if she slept too long, she'd begin to dream and when she began to dream, the nightmares took its customary place to haunt her night after night.  

He said to her that there was somebody else that loved her.

So she went and found the other two that had left her before him.  And when she was about to ask them if they loved her they turned away from her.  They rejected her.  Leaving her dejected and alone.  She did not even have to ask.  She already knew their answer.  She wanted him to know that there was nobody that loved her like she wanted to be loved by him.  

But he had never been wrong before.  

There must be someone she said to herself over and over again.  There must be someone that loves me.  She knew that there were people out there that loved her but not in the way that she wanted him to love her but he could not because he loved another until it drove him away.  How hard she looked and how hard she cried she still was not able to find the one he spoke of.  

And she cried not only for him but herself now.  

All she had ever wanted in life was to be wife and a mother.  To be safe and to be happy and to be loved.  She never thought that was much of a request.  But now she knew how precious it was.  She swore to herself that when she found someone to love her she was going to love him back as much as she was able to.  It might not be as much as she loved.  But she loved that someone because he loved her back.  

She swore to find someone who loved her.  

"I never knew."

"I had no idea it was that bad."  

Touya held Tomoyo tightly in his arms, cradling her as they both tried to find comfort they wished to bestow upon Sakura as soon as she was ready.  Hugging each other closely, they eventually kissed each other with a bittersweet emotion of love and guilt.  They had found each other when the one that they loved had been suffering such incredible pain.  

"I want Sakura to be happy."

"So do I."

"At least, Kero's with her."

"I'm glad she tells someone, even if it is him."  

She reached up and cupped his face tenderly.  "I love you, Touya."  She kissed both of his cheeks.  "And Sakura loves you."  She met him lips to lips.  "Don't forget that you are her oniichan and that you are her family.  She didn't want to hurt you because you felt guilty that he went away and if you knew what pain she was in, she knew it was going to hurt you.  Be patient and she will come to you for help."

He leaned heavily against her for support.  "I hope she comes to both of us."

"So do I." 

She drifted from her sweet dreams of him.  

She drifted away into the dark nightmare.  

She drifted for the sake of drifting somewhere 

                                                                                                ---far from here.   

**Author's Note:**  The series isn't dead.  But the motivation to write it is dwindling pretty fast.  Please review, thanks.  


	9. The One She Loves is?

Title:  **A Sweet Blossoming**

Author:  Yih

Written:  July 2002 / September 2002

Disclaimer:  All rights of characters are exclusively Clamp.  

Author's Note:  OMG!  Thanks everyone for reviewing, even though it seemed like I was never going to update.  I finally did it and it's all thanks to you guys!  If you hadn't been there with the occasional review (i do check on it randomly) this Chapter wouldn't be possible.  CCS fanfics aren't my priority anymore--- but if you like my writing style--- I'd check out my original novel "Like You (Xi Wan Ni)" also on FF.net under this same alias ^-~.  

9: The One She Loves Is...?

"She's dreaming of him again."

"I know," Yue responded softly, gazing at Sakura with a love eternal in his eyes.  "She's always dreaming about him.  It's the only time I really see a true smile on her face."

"You could make her smile," Kero murmured.  "You could make her really smile again, if you wanted to.  You could do it."

"That's what I want more than anything," he replied vehemently.  "I'd like anything to make her as happy as she was when he was here."

"Then tell her you love her," Kero commanded.  "What she wants now, what she desperately needs right now is to believe and to know that someone loves her besides me.  I can't provide her the love that she needs.  She wants that kind of love, that kind of love that you feel for her, Yue.  Tell her you love her before it's too late.  She's drifting now.  She's drifting away into her heaven and her torture.  She can't have him.  He's gone.  But you, she could love.  She could love you more.  She always saw more in you than anyone else." 

"Clow Reed loves her," Yue said dully.  

"Eriol?  He feels for Sakura?" he exclaimed in surprise.  

"Yes," Yue answered harshly, "he told me that she has carved a place in his heart for an infinity.  How can I deny him?  He was my master."  

"He isn't," Kero denied.  "He's not Clow Reed as Clow Reed was.  He is only part of Clow Reed that is, not was.  He was not Clow Reed.  He is only Eriol.  He is only a rival for Sakura's affection, nothing more.  What you really need to worry about is the shadow of her long gone love.  A shadow that you share.  Will you tell her that you love her?"

"I can't," Yue said huskily.  "I can't face denial."

"She won't deny you if she thinks about it.  I've watched the way she watches you."

"She doesn't watch me for me.  She watches me to see him."

"No, she watches just for you."

"I can't compete with him, Kero.  No one can, not even Clow Reed.  There was something about him that was magical.  That was horribly gentle love.  He was like an angel from above," Yue muttered with an awe in the edge of his voice.  

Kero shrugged.  "I think you can."  

_"Why did you leave me?" Sakura cried out.  "Why did you have to leave me?  Why wasn't I enough for you?  Why couldn't I be the one that you wanted?  That you loved?  I could have been there for you.  I could have helped you through the bad times.  But you didn't want me to.  You didn't even give me the chance?  Why?  Why?  Why not?!"  _

_"Because," he answered as he always answered in her dreams, "I cannot be there for you.  There is someone else that loves you, just look to the one that stands closest to you.  He has been waiting for you.  He loves you very much."  _

_"You were the one that stood close to me through all the hard times!  I thought--- I thought that you'd always be there for me!" Sakura exclaimed in a heartbroken voice.  "But you had to leave, you had to leave!  Why?  Why?  Why did you have to leave?!  Couldn't you have stayed for me?"_

_"No," he answered.  "No, I couldn't have stayed for you.  I have said before and I will say again.  I only loved you as a sister, Sakura.  There was another that I loved more deeply than I have ever loved anyone, but the one he loved was not me."_

_"Then what about me?  Isn't it the same for me?" she questioned through her sobbing voice.  "Isn't it unfair to me to leave me to this misery alone?  Couldn't we comfort each other in each others misery?"  _

_He smiled serenely.  "No, it's not the same for you.  I'm only your first infatuation, your first crush.  You will have someone that, you do have someone else that you love dearly.  But you can't see that yet.  You can't see that yet, can you?"_

_"Why?  Why?" she cried out again.  "Why?"_

_"Because I loved him so much and he didn't love me.  I couldn't take it, Sakura.  I couldn't stand it.  I'm not as strong as you are Sakura.  You're very strong, though fragile as well.  I'm sorry I've hurt you.  But it's only for the best.  There's one who loves you very deeply.  I only hope you will one day see that, my sweet Sakura."  _

_He started fading away.  Fading away into the misty glow of a pure white light.  She called out to him to stay.  But he kept getting further and further away from her.  No matter how hard she cried out to him, the distance kept increasing--- even accelerating.  And somehow no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't move her legs--- she couldn't move her legs to chase after her.  She wanted to follow him, she wanted to follow him wherever he went.  _

_But she couldn't.  The vision closed and she was left in the darkness where she still was.  The white light had faded, that beautiful serene glow she always associated with him.  She was back in the darkness.  But for a moment, she saw another light, not quite as bright--- but still beautiful.  It was a hazy silver gleam.  It seemed so familiar.  She reached for it.  She reached for it to try to hold on to something.  _

Sakura had been fitfully tossing in her sleep as she had cried, the tears falling down her cheeks in a silent stream of sadness.  And somewhere along the way, her movements had become even more frantic--- and she had reached out to him and grabbed him.  He had felt a surge of joy course through his vein at her simple, unconscious touch.  He didn't care, it made him feel better to have her actually touching him.  

A serene look had come over her face from the desperate look from before.  It mesmerized him.  His face fell over her, his long locks framing around her face--- where he was leaning over.  Her lips tantalized him.  He wanted to kiss her.  If he kissed her now, she'd never know.  She'd never know if he did.  And it'd make him feel so much better.  And besides, Kero had actually left now--- Kero wasn't here.  It was the perfect time.  

Yes, she thought, it's silver--- it's beautiful.  There was silver all around her now.  She was surrounded by a silver waterfall and a dark figure that was coming toward her.  As he drew closer to him, she was surprised to see that it was only the dark shadows that had made h him seem like the shadows that had consumed her.  Instead, he was a radiant silver.  She strained to look at his face.  But the atmosphere was still shadowy enough to hide his features.  

_But his walk, his silhouette reminded her so much of the one she had lost.  She grew hopeful.  Maybe he had returned.  Maybe it was him that was walking towards her.  But no, no could it possibly be?  Could it be?  Could it be him?  She held her hand out to him and framed his face, still covered by those silver strands.  She was so sure, she was so positive it was him.  _

_"Yukito?"  _

He had been just about to kiss her, especially when she had framed his face with her comforting hands.  He had just been about to kiss her when she had said that dreaded name.  _Yukito.  Yukito.  Yukito.  _Yukito was always on her mind.  He didn't understand it.  Why couldn't she get over Yukito?  Why?  Why couldn't she see him for Yue?  He wasn't Yukito, but he loved her anyways.  He loved her so deeply that it hurt that she couldn't see it.  

She brushed the hair away.  It was not Yukito.  She shook her head sadly and withdrew her hands away from him.  And when she withdrew her hands, the silver--- the beautiful silver that had comforted her when Yukito had left disappeared away from her.  It too ran away from her.  She fell to her knees, collapsing because nothing beautiful would ever stay with her.  Why did she always have to be alone?  Why couldn't she find someone to love her? "Why did you have to die, Yukito?" she asked softly.  "It wouldn't have been so bad if you hadn't died.  I could have at least moved on... but your death, it made me linger and to think of only you.  I can't seem to move on.  I can't seem to move on beyond your death."  

"Syaoran," called Meilin, "Eriol has something to say to you."  

Eriol was the last person on the face of this Earth that Syaoran wanted to see.  It wasn't that he disliked his ancestor, but he'd prefer to have nothing to do with Eriol after all that had happened.  It'd be better if he'd forgotten the card-capturing days that still haunted him in his nightmares.  He was happy now with Meilin, and he'd finally forgotten about Sakura.  He was even married to Meilin, and they were expecting their first child.  But still a part of him would never forget Sakura... he missed her, but he was certain he didn't love her anymore.  

"What does he want?" he asked.  

"He wants you to come to Japan," Meilin responded calmly.  "He says it's important.  It has to do with Sakura."  Syaoran noted the concern in Meilin's voice and he drew her close to his side.  

"I don't love her anymore," he told her firmly.  "The one I love is you now.  Besides, how couldn't I love the mother of my child?"  

Meilin blushed and subconsciously rubbed her now protruding stomach.  They had only been married a year, and now they were expecting their first child.  It had come earlier than either of them had expected, but--- they were happy.  And she could already tell that Syaoran was going to make a wonderful father.  He was so attentive and caring.  

"You should go to see him, Syaoran," Meilin told him.  "From the sound of his voice, he has something urgent to tell you.  You should just go to Japan.  I trust you."  

He didn't quite trust himself with seeing Sakura for the first time since he too had left her, desolated.  He had felt despicable then, but he had to leave.  He couldn't stand to see her so utterly lovesick over Yukito.  He couldn't stand it.  And he couldn't stand to be parted from Meilin either.  She was always his best friend and closest confidant.  He trusted her so entirely.  "I'll go, if you go with me."  

She looked up into his fiercely burning eyes.  "Okay," she answered.  "I'll tell Eriol that we're coming."  

He nodded and kissed her cheek before she went away to tell Eriol the good news, that Syaoran had agreed to come.  He turned away to face the window and wondered what Eriol was up to.  If he was asking them to come to Japan--- it had something to do with Sakura.  He knew it--- it was an instinctive, gut feeling.  It had to do with Sakura.  

What was wrong?  He hoped nothing was wrong.  But then Eriol wouldn't have turned to him.  He knew he was the last person Eriol would turn to... definitely the last one.  "Sakura," he said her name softly enough that Meilin couldn't hear him, "what's happened now?"  


End file.
